by Kai Sin™ ♥

Thank, my friend who give me present and wishes =]

昨天，他问我是不是很想吵架，我就觉得不对劲。。 我问KornEe是不是真的给他了？她不要讲，问他也不要讲。。 觉得我很像白痴~ 当他打电话时，我就觉得，他应该知道了。。 接受不到一个人突然间看我写的东西，更何况是他，当场就哭。。 不管那时在客厅，一边听他的电话，一边在哭。。深呼吸也没用，眼泪就是一直流。。 最后，真的无法再讲电话，告诉他隔天再讲。。 对不起，不是不要给你看，是我怕伤感情。。 KornEe，我没有责怪你，你也没有帮倒忙，你只是关心朋友罢了，谢谢你~

何谓朋友？？朋友是会在你需要援助时，伸出援手。给你依靠，支持你的人。。寂寞时 ，陪你，聊心事等。。他的喜怒哀乐，愿意和你分享。。而你，也会很乐意地临听~正如你之前有提到。 When i saw it, I copy and paste to my blog.. I hope all people know what the meaning of friend.. Friendship forever~

19-9-2009 Every saturday, he will call to me.. Then we two have to chit chat a while.. How i wait so long, he didnt call me? >. Then i ask him.. HAizz no surprise already.. Zzz He say that he want to call me at 12.00am and say happy birthday to me.. But i ask him already so no surprise, just chat a while and say happy birthday to me =] 20-9-2009 In the morning.. My phone have a lot of message.. All also wish me happy birthday =] Oh yea, that day my family and i had go to Ipoh.. On the way, i had keep sms.. Untill let my dad say -.- No choice, have many message need to reply it.. Hope everybody happy always =] Have a person tell me that monday got thing tell me.. But i dont believe her.. Monday sure got thing happen in class.. I must becareful!!

看了一些人的部落格，感觉到失恋的痛苦。。 我会失恋吗？ 我会感觉到痛苦吗？ 我会失去他吗？ 答案只能等到以后才知道。。 我很怕我付出的多，得到的却是痛苦这两个字。。 虽然他每次说不会有那么一天发生，可是我们这阶段的恋情是不会永久的。。 为什么他你每次很怕跟我讲话？ 是我的错吗？是我不敢跟他讲话还是我们都尴尬？ 为什么你跟别人讲话却很顺利的？ 难道是我的错觉？ 虽然我们称得上是情侣，可是我觉得事实不是情侣。。 我现在真的没有安全感。。 不是我不相信你，是你令我不相信。。 彼此都很多追求者，彼此都很怕被人拉走。。 记得有一次，我说，如果我跑掉，你会再追回吗？ 你跟我说，不会。。我问为什么？你说，心都不在了，追回有什么用？ 第二次，不懂怎样聊到，这个话题‘如果有一个人跟你抢我’，你却说，如果那个人比我好，我让给他。。 我那时很生气得回你，你就这样把我让给他？差一点就要和你吵架。。 如果真的发生呢？你会问我喜欢谁吗？你会问我的意见吗？还是真的就这样把我让给他？ 我们能沟通的只有sms方式。。 那天，跟你走在一起，你没有跟我讲话。。 到家的时候，你问我怎么没有讲话。。 我说，我忙着怎样开礼物，把另外一个给你。。 我问回你，你却说在等我开口讲话。。 什么烂理由？如果我没有开口先，你不会么？ 还是说我不主动？对不起，我是一个被动的人。。 那天被老师打，我再等你得问我痛不痛。。 等到自己跑去问你。。 我对这件是非常耿耿于怀，我不是要其他人的关心，而是要你的，可是为什么你都不会像其他人一样呢？ 我跟你的关系，甚至被好朋友说讨厌。。 对，我也有害你跟你的好朋友吵架。。 可是，男生都不小气，你们有像以前一样哈哈大笑。。 可是，我跟她，却不能像以前一样了，会觉得很怕她，很怕到不敢跟她一起。。 是我多心？ 还是这就是事实？ 我付出的比你还要多。。 我很怕最后得不到什么。。。 我们没有吵架。。 只是我的感受。。。。

Today, We exam sejarah after recess.. Before 15 minute keep exam paper, my BC teacher borrow 'rotan' from the CHuN mEe, coz she pass through our class.. Then the ChuN mEe in our class check girl who dont have ribbon.. I'm the person who dont have ribbon =X So, LY was the person let her hit.. Second is me.. T.T Salma faster tied her ribbon up, jing too.. Haizz, so many people let she hit.. Palia her!! >. Keipo, still other 10 more minute also want tied ribbon, dai kia~~ After keep the exam paper, and the ChuN mEe going out.. J asking me whether got pain or not, i show my hand to him.. Really pain la~ Untill now still red red.. =S After school, i stay at class.. Coz he say want give me the present.. While waiting he give me, i am scaring my bus have gone.. After a few minute, i were called he faster.. Then he at between R class and Q class give me the present.. We two walk together to door there, But we two didnt talk to each other.. I'm waiting he care about my hand.....

Hate my cousin like this treat my mum.. Stupiak! My mum didn't do any wrong thing, why like this treat her.. Hate them so much. =[ Today, just me and my small sis at home when come back from shop.. After doing my revision, nothing to do.. See tv, dont have any movie is nice.. Suddenly, take out my present when last year my friend present me.. I see my wish 'paper' when at that night writed.. got 3 wishes in the paper.. 1. Hope funny team will be friend again 2. Hope my family member healthy forever 3. Hope i can tall My first wishes is funny team! That time really hope can be friend again.. But at last also dont know what relationship..haizz I also got recordation that day what happen.. One year already~ One year's day really pass till so tired. . . The photo that my friend give me the present.. My bus friend present me.. thanx SiUHui present me.. thanx PeiWen and LiAn ChiNg present me.. thanx ChiN Wei And KiatChuAn present me.. thanx My wishes paper.... Hope this year...

When end his call, i prepare my thing for sleep.. Who know, i want start brush teeth, mum stopped me and call me drink dont know what thing de water =X Damn no nice to drink.. Bitter la~~ Haizz, tired now.. Some more i still update my blog.. Wait the water no so hot.. He still waiting i sleep, Now, need he wait.. Call he go sleep, he dont want.. want wait me >. Feel sorry to him.. Coz he morning still go school for kokuriklum.. haizz.. Bluff him i want sleepe edi.. more sorry to him.. Zzz

Osshhhh~ My birthday is closer and closer.. I waiting that day coming.. When last year, my birthday just a trouble day for me.. Nothing special also.. I really hope this year birthday will nothing happen to me.. Gonna exam, wont on9 and update blog in next week.. Good luck ya^^

Got people ask me 'kaisin, u very happy hor'.. I answer that people 'huh? y ask like this?' that people say cause my name.. Yea, i agree.. Sometimes i really very happy.. I'm happy when with my friend.. I'm happy when with my classmate.. I'm happy when with my family (sometimes) I'm happy when eat ice-cream.. Bla bla bla bla~~ still got many many.. I very like to smile.. >. I can laugh without any reason.. I can laugh when i think some of funny thing.. That why hui always scold me sampat -.- I hope my friend and my family happy forever~

Yesterday, i want to sleep when evening.. After 5 minute, fall asleep already.. Sleep Sleep Sleep, in half heard people call at outside house.. I tot i dreaming, then didnt care about outside person.. After a time, i straight wake up and see outside, really got people calling us. That people is repair something de.. Zzz Early dont want come, when all people sleep then he come >. Let me cant sleep!! pekcek~ At night, i sleep early.. But i think same as before When tomorrow wake up, feel very sleepy la.. Zzz In bus, sleep untill reach school.. In class, want sleep but cant sleep.. Coz my classmate too noisy edi >. Now, i want go sleep le.. very tired la~

Today, when back i take my phone check my message Lol~ my phone dont know what happen.. Gonna ki siao >. Haizz.. I ask my mum whether got people break down my phone from table She answer me not.. BUT my phone let me know got people touching my phone.. Whatever la.. I want throw it to River Klang.. Haizz Damn pek cek la!! Cant sms.. =X

September is a exam month.. Next week gonna exam again =X Haizz.. Hope i will do well in exam.. Friend too^^ After 28 day have to PMR.. I still not yet prepare la.. >. After 11 day have my birthday^^ Good luck^^

Today can say i non-stop eat >. Today i with chloe go to makmak eat our lunch after attened geography extra class.. When reach home, i see the table got one package of noodles.. I think is sister havent eat, so no 'care' about the food.. Who know mum say that food is mine.. =.= har? i just eat at school la.. Zzz I remember that morning i call mum no need help me buy food.. Buy she still buy No choice, i have to eat second time >. Tonight, mum going to dinner, no people cook for us eat.. While, my dad bring three of us go to KFC take away the food back home eat.. Who know he say no enough to eat.. Somemore still buy two package of noodless.. =.= Alamak!!! One day eat four time.. how come i not fat? >. I want keep fit!!!!!

Sometimes, i feel myself why always think negative way? Positive way cant think? (last year) Why i always feel all people dislike, and very care about very their feeling..(last year) Now, i not so stupid.. Even my friend hate me, let them hate.. My family's member dislike me, let them dislike.. Now i not care anything.. I also very tired do people or live in this world.. My family treat me like this, how come i will happy up? I really very tired in this world.. Mom and dad them dont like me, sis chap my thing.. My life got my sister, i think i wont happy!! Or i got do wrong thing? i dont think i do any wrong thing.. My life just colourless and darkness.. colourful? i think when small small my life colour just got white and black oni.. I really very tired in this world.. No people care about me.. I want get love from this family.. How i try many time also dont have.. Is they didnt give? or i stupid cant feel it? Today, i dont know i cry how many time.. I really very get sad in this ...

I dont know why i so unlucky in this family.. I dont like any people in this family.. Except my small sis or my mom (sometimes dont like her) Yesterday night, we at outside eat our dinner.. I see no people pour tea inside cup.. Then, i help my mom do it.. She call me give sister pour, i dont want, i got the power pour myself.. My dad say me dont want act pro.. What the, i just help u all do thing, also want let u all say? Fine, i give my sis pour, i diam diam sms.. After eat our dinner, we go jj shopping.. My mom and sis want buy thing, but my dad want buy ice-cream.. My mom push me help my dad buy.. Eh, You dont have mouth call me? why should push me? i am ur dog or toy? Today, When back from eating.. I sit at car.. My sis say me hiao.. ok, i tahan.. She one time no say enough.. say second time, three time, four time........ We two quarrel in car very kao lat.. She call me dont want ask her math.. Stupid, i not friend can ask? why shouold i ask u? I hope if got a people help me slap, ...

This time really pek cek in class. I dont know i want tell she my thing or not.. IF she one day know, she will angry? Or i tell her better? haizz.. I really dont know la.. Zzz If i tell her.. she say why will accept him.. Now dont want pattor 1st better.. If i dont want tell her.. got one day, she sure know.. Then will angry.. Zzz Pekcek la!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday, dont know what happen.. Suddenly no mood.. Always like this, online then no mood. Then, i find salma chat.. All thing i have to tell her.. Me and my ex's thing also tell her.. Between J and K's thing also tell her.. That time really no mood.. Still dont know i choose K is correct or not.. haizz Sometimes feel i no accept any people more good.. Dont have many confused's thing around me and him.. Yesterday also cant sleep, think salma teach me de thing.. But i forget their face =.= Feel very sorry to J, then sms say sorry to him.. Today, we at class count the point to next year in what class de.. haizz.. I'm the higher mark between they all.. haizz I scare will in K class or not same class with them.. Hope we 8 people will same class...

Today, teacher give us exam paper.. Luckly all pass =) Just the math very less mark.. But BM very high mark.. First time my BM get so high mark.. hehee. damn happy la.. Teacher also mark very relax, i oni get so high mark Thanx cik.salmah Hope my english dont want get fail..